Our Time
by bennettbrigadier
Summary: After episode 3x21, Jeremy and Bonnie are forced into an uncomfortable situation which makes them face their history. And move forward. New chapters will fill in holes from the season finale and after.
1. Chapter 1

I hate tequila.

I'm not entirely sure why I kept drinking so much. I'm sure Caroline had something to do with it, since she kept filling my shot glass. "Bonnie, Klaus is gone because you're a damn good witch," she said every time she brought the bottle over to refill my glass.

And I'm a horrible drunk. I had to excuse myself to the couch because every time I looked over at Jeremy on the other side of the kitchen, I felt like blurting things out at him. Angry things. Loving things. Even after what we went through together today, he barely looked at me. And naturally, with my luck, it was Jeremy who shook me awake at midnight with a glass of water.

"How do you feel?" he asked with a chuckle. He smelled like soap and his hair was wet. I felt my cheeks getting warm. How embarassing. I smoothed down my hair and wiped my mouth before before I took the glass. I hope I didn't drool or snore, or have one of those nightmares.

"I'm fine, Jeremy. Where is everyone?"

"Caroline and Tyler took Matt home. He was too drunk to drive himself."

"Caroline must forget we're not all vampires and hybrids. We don't recover as quickly as she does."

"Tell me about it. If Elena hadn't forced me to stop drinking, I'd have my head in the toilet right now."

"Where is Elena?

"Upstairs. I left her painting Alaric's room. Figured I'd give her some space."

Small talk. We're making small talk. Like we've known each other for five minutes. He's done the same thing every time we've spoken since we broke up. Being cute and cordial; acting like nothing ever happened. I keep hoping that one day he'll walk up to me, tell me he made a mistake and that he wants to give us another try. He never does and frankly, I'm not sure I would give us another try. I stood up and started walking to the door.

"I guess I should call Jaime and ask him to give me a ride home," I said with my back to Jeremy.

"Bonnie, wait."

I turned around to look at Jeremy's face, hope flaring inside of me.

"I can give you a ride."

"It's ok, Jeremy. He wouldn't mind." I don't know if I just saw a tick go across Jeremy's face or if what's left of the Tequila in my system is playing tricks on me, but I decide to push my luck. "And he can just stay over so he doesn't have to drive back across town to go back home. No big deal. Really." I feel bad using Jaime as a device to get a rise out of Jeremy, but what other ammo do I have? It's not like there's a line of men waiting to court me going around the block.

"Seriously, Bonnie?"

"What?" I answered as innocently as I could muster.

"I didn't need to hear that."

"Sorry, Jeremy. Look, I'm going to call him and wait on the porch." I'm internally jumping for joy that he didn't like my mention of Jaime. It's a good sign, right? I walk out the door before he can say anything else and call Jaime. It rings a few times and I go into voicemail. Shit. He either slept through my call or finally got the picture that my circle and I aren't exactly the safest of people to be around. Either way, I guess I have to go ask Jeremy for that ride. Great.

The front door opens behind me and Jeremy walks out before I even get a chance to turn around with a jacket and a pair of keys in his hands . "First of all," he said while putting the jacket around my shoulders and facing me, "you shouldn't be out here alone with Alaric out there. Second, don't wake up that Jaime guy. It's rude. Third, I'm taking you home, Bonnie. We need to talk." His wet hair shined in the light of the porch and he had on that oddly gorgeous determined face he wears when he's made his mind up about something. I wouldn't have been able to say no to him even if Jaime had picked up his phone. He started walking to the driveway and I followed him like a puppy.

He opened the car door for me and shut it behind me. The three seconds it takes him to get to the driver side door feels like an eternity. My heart feels like its in my throat and my palms are starting to get sweaty. I chew on my lip because it's the only way I'm going to be able to keep my mouth shut. As many things as I want to say, I'm going to let him be the one to start this conversation. I deserve that much. He owes me that. By the time he gets into the car, I'm feeling like I might explode. He puts the keys into the ignition and backs out of the driveway. In silence.

For the next few minutes of the ride, the only sounds I hear are Jeremy and Elena's junior high graduation tassels hanging from the rearview mirror and bumping up against the dashboard. When I look over expectantly at Jeremy, he turns his attention from the road to the dial on the radio. Adele's "Somebody Like You" comes blaring out of the speakers. _Sometimes__it__lasts__in__love__and__sometimes__it__hurts__instead_. I couldn't help but to laugh, sink further down into my seat and look out of the window. I can't believe this. Did he lie just to get me in the car? Did he have any intention to talk to me? I looked to the moon and asked for the strength to get through the next six minutes. His hand slammed down on the power button to turn the radio off and I wanted to cry. He's nothing like the Jeremy I remember, nothing like the Jeremy I fell in love with. I risk another glance at his face, searching for something familiar. His thick brows are furrowed together and his hands are gripping the steering wheel like he's trying to kill it. He feels me looking at him and looks back into my eyes. A sigh escapes his lips and my stomach sinks to my feet.

"Let me out, Jeremy."

"Bonnie, I'm so sorry," we say at exactly the same time.

After an awkward moment of silence, he continued, "For everything. I'm sorry for everything, Bonnie. When you brought me back and I started seeing people, I freaked out. I had lost everything, you know that. Vicky came back, then Anna and I felt like I could save them, I felt like I could start over."

"Why did you want to start over in the first place, Jeremy? You were with me! What about me, Jeremy? Did I mean that little to you? Did you care?"

"I did care Bonnie. I still care. When we got together, I felt like I was starting to heal. You made me feel like I could get over it all. I finally got the girl I grew up crushing on."

"And then what? You got me and got over it? Anna showed up as a freaking ghost and you forgot you had a girlfriend?"

He sighed again and twisted his mouth like I had hurt his feelings. The nerve. "The first time Anna spoke to me, Bonnie, I —"

"Jeremy, for the sake of my sanity, don't say my name and hers in the same sentence right now."

"I'm sorry. The first time she spoke to me, I just felt like I had a chance to say goodbye. Anna and I got cut short and I never got the chance to say bye."

"Neither did Matt, Jeremy. He didn't say bye to his sister and he still let her go the second time around. And if you were going to be sneaking behind my back with your ghost girlfriend, you should've just broken up with me. That would have been better than cheating on me."

"I couldn't, Bonnie. I never wanted to leave you. I was caught up with Anna but I still wanted to be with you. I know it sounds fucked up, but in the back of my head, I knew that Anna was temporary."

"Ok, Jeremy, I'm done. Let me out of the car." I can't control the tears rolling down my face. They're angry tears at this point. I thought finally having this conversation would be relieving, but it's just opening up old wounds.

"Bonnie, I'm not letting you out yet. We're almost at your house."

"I'll walk."

When he pulled the car over, the tears turned into sad ones. There he went, letting me go again. I put my purse on my shoulder and reached for the latch on the door.

"Bonnie, give me one more minute. Please."

My hand stayed on the door handle and I look straight ahead of me. "59, 58—"

"I love you. I was stupid and I know I'm never going to make up for what I did to you. I know it. I know I'm never going to get you back, but you have to know that it's true. I love you. I thought I loved Vicky. I thought I loved Anna. I broke when they both died, but I promise you, Bonnie, seeing you everyday hurts me more than when they died. I cared about them both, Deeply, but not like this. I've been a fucking idiot in the past, you know it, you've been a witness to it, but I've never fucked anything up like I fucked us up. I can't look at you without wanting to kiss you. I can barely speak to you because I know I'm going to make a fool of myself like I am right now. I don't have any good excuses, but I regret all of it. I love you, Bonnie."

"Jeremy, I'm not sure if you know what love is, but you're doing it wrong. You lied. You cheated. You avoided me. After everything we had been through together, after I sacrificed my connection to the witches to bring you back because I couldn't stand the thought of being without you, you betrayed me." I'm pretty sure I'm screaming, and I'm pretty sure I'm ugly crying, but it all comes spilling out, "Don't tell me you regret it, Jeremy. You let her in. Don't think I don't know that she didn't just show up out of the blue. You willed her there, Jeremy. It was mutual. You wanted her to be there and she wanted to be with you. You made her come through. While you were with me. You thought of her while you were with me. It wasn't some random one-time mistake. You… you broke my heart, Jeremy. And it wasn't a mistake. And in spite of all of that, in spite of all the pain, you have no idea how scared I was today. I thought, for a second, that I had lost you again. I can't handle it, Jeremy. You will never know how much you've hurt me, and I still can't bring myself not to care. That's the worst part."

I'm surprised when I look over and see his eyes are watery. We sit in silence again for a few minutes before he reaches over and takes my hand in his. I let him. It's been so long. He just sits there with his eyes on the street in front of him, holding my hand.

"Say something, Jeremy. You owe me that. You've spent enough time not talking to me."

"I'm trying to figure out a way to sweep you off your feet again. Thinking of a master plan to get you to forgive me, to love me again, to trust me again."

I laugh and wipe my eyes with my free hand. "Jeremy, I love you. I never stopped. But I don't know how to forgive you and I don't know how to trust you. I don't know if I can."

This is everything I wanted. His admission of guilt, his apology, his love, but I couldn't help but to be wary.

"Try. Just try, Bonnie. Answer this for me: Were we good together? We were, weren't we?"

"We were good, Jeremy, but not good enough to keep you from kissing Anna."

"We were good, Bonnie. We were better than good, but I wasn't. I can be better for you."

"And what if Anna shows up again one day, Jeremy? You really think I'm going to take that risk?"

"Bonnie, the only time I think about Anna now is when I think about how badly I messed up and how much I miss you. I fell asleep every night in Colorado with my phone in my hand, looking at one of my pictures of us. Anna and I had our time. Twice, unfortunately. I need for us to have ours. Without me being an asshole. I'm not going to hurt you again, Bonnie, I swear."

The mention of Colorado distracted me from the banality of it all, "You were compelled to go to Colorado and you sound like a TV show, Jeremy."

"What?"

"Elena had Damon compel you again. She wanted you to be safe with all the Originals running around. And you sound like a TV show with your 'I won't hurt you's'."

He grit his teeth and took a second to compose himself again. "Bonnie, let me try. Let me in again. Please." He wasn't going to let me derail this conversation.

"I'll think about it, Jeremy. Now, it's been a long day. Please take me home."

"That's better than nothing," he said while putting the car in drive and finally getting on the road again.

We sat in silence yet again until we got to my house. I took his jacket off my shoulders, thanked him for the ride and got out of the car. I heard a car door slam behind me and turned to see him following me. "Jeremy, I dessicated Klaus, killed you and brought you back to life. I'm fully capable of walking 30 feet to my front door."

He smiled at that, "You are amazing, you know that?"

I laughed, "So I've been told."

When we reached the front door, he put his jacket back over my shoulders, and engulfed me in his big arms. Jeremy hugs. He's always made me feel protected and wanted with those hugs. I couldn't help but feel that way again now with my face in the nook of his neck and my feet hanging off the ground. When he put me down, he cradled my face in his hands and stared in my eyes. Something about the way he was looking at me, the way he seemed to be searching my eyes made this all very real. "I love you, Bonnie. I'm sorry I hadn't said it before. I'm sorry for everything I've done to hurt you. You don't have to believe me now, but you will."

I tippy-toed, gave him a kiss on the cheek with a smile on my face, unlocked my door and walked into my house.


	2. Chapter 2

I put my back to the door and my two hands where Jeremy's had just been. What a big freaking ball of emotions that had just made me. I love him. I knew it the night he died the first time, I knew it today when I stopped his heart and I still know it now. But I'm still angry. Even with all I had said to Jeremy in the car, I still hadn't said enough. I was mad at myself for going relatively easy on him.

But still, for the first time since we even started dating, I know now how much he cares. I know I'm not just a girl he dated, a girl he had a crush on. I could see it in his face. As many times as we had kissed while we were together and as many times as he had looked at me, none of those looks compared to tonight's. The way he looked at me tonight made me feel vulnerable and naked. Without saying a word, his eyes begged me for trust, for a chance. Without a word, he made me believe that he loves me.

I walked upstairs and put on my tank top and shorts pajama set Caroline had given me on my last birthday. I went into the bathroom to wash my face and I caught myself smiling in the mirror. I hadn't seen myself look like this in a very long time. I smiled in front of Jaime because I felt like I should. I kissed him to force myself to not think of Jeremy. Jaime was nice, hot even, but I was kidding myself. Jeremy is it.

I jumped when the doorbell rang. Thank goodness Dad's out of town again. Can't imagine he'd take kindly to anyone being at his door after midnight. Jeremy had only dropped me off ten minutes ago, so when I checked the peephole, I wasn't surprised when I saw him standing on my porch looking flustered with his hands in his pockets.

I opened the door, "Yes, Jeremy?"

He looked me up and down and bit his lip. The heat that I felt rush over my body in that moment was weakening. He lowered his eyes to my breasts before saying "I don't want to go home."

"Jer, it'll be 1 in the morning soon, the only place you should be right now is home. And my eyes are up here."

He laughed and threw his hand in the air. "You caught me, I'm sorry. Listen, I love my sister, but don't feel like dealing with Elena right now. I can't. After everything that's gone on, I don't want to bother her too much and I know if I go home, we'll only fight about compelling me to go to Colorado. I'll sleep on the couch."

I opened the door all the way and waved him in. "You're not sleeping on the couch. Let's go." I took his hand and led him up the stairs to my room. He stood in the doorway awkwardly staring at the bed.

"Oh, don't act like you've never been in here before." I sat down and patted the spot in front of me. "Siddown."

He sat crossed legged on the foot of the bed facing me and took my hand again. He was giving me the same look he had given me earlier. He made me feel vulnerable, but there was vulnerability on his part too. He was pleading with me.

"I'm scared of you, Jeremy. Terrified," I said to him honestly.

He got closer to me on the bed and tucked my hair behind my ear. He took my face in his hands and slowly kissed my forehead, my left cheek, my right and looked back into my eyes with a question in his. I felt heat rushing to my face and the back of my neck.

I looked at his face; his brown eyes, his straight nose, his full lips. I wanted this more than anything. I've wanted it since the masquerade; since the night he told me he wasn't a kid anymore.

I slammed my mouth into his and took what I wanted. He lips were warm and his tongue tasted like cinnamon. Just like it had before. I had forgotten how familiar his kisses had become, how his rhythm changed with his moods. Right now he was happy. And he wanted me. And it was mutual.

I broke our kiss long enough to get him to stand up. I looked up at him and smiled. I had my Jeremy back. The Jeremy I had fallen in love with. The one I could be open and playful with. I could never forget what he'd done, but for this moment, I'd put it in the back of my mind. I took the bottom hem of his shirt in my hands and guided it off his body. I placed my hand on his chest and let my magic soar. The lights flickered and the candles on the mantle began to burn. Jeremy looked around the room in awe as he always had and smiled down at me. "God, I've missed you, Bon."

He leaned down and began to kiss me again. His fingers played lightly on the small of my back, sending goosebumps up my spine. He slid them down to palm my ass before he picked me up. I wrapped my legs around his hips and felt his cock throbbing against me through his jeans. This moment was perfect. Absolute perfection. And I wasn't going to look back. His lips and tongue began to trail below my lips, on my chin and to my neck. He laid me down on the bed softly and broke contact with my skin. I missed his lips the second they left my neck. "Are we doing this, Bonnie? Because if it's too soon we can —"

I grabbed his face and brought him back down to kiss me. Our tongues danced in our mouths. A moan jumped out of my lips and I said, "I love you, Jeremy. I'm ready for this. I want you. Now. My only regret up until now had been not getting to do this before things went to shit. It's our time now. Now." His hand, that had been on my waist immediately reached between us to cup my pussy. My back arched and he took my nipple into his mouth through my tank top. While his hand made circular motions around my clit, his teeth nibbled lightly on my nipple. I reached down to take the tank top off as quickly as I could and that seemed to make his hand's speed on me increase. I ground up against his hand and could tell that in no time, I was going to be a goner. He smiled at me knowingly and put his hands down my shorts, under my panties and found my clit again. His rhythm, the firmness and certainty of his hands were driving me crazy. My breath got heavier, I moaned loudly and I rolled my hips to join him in making me come. I brought his face back to mine, took his bottom lip in my mouth and sucked it gently as he rubbed me into an orgasm. My body shook under him as the orgasm rocked me. He kissed me once before bringing the fingers he used to massage me to his mouth. He sucked them and smiled again, "You alright, babe?"

"You know I am," I answered breathlessly. "Good." He stood up, took his jeans off and got back into the bed. I began to take my shorts off and he grabbed my hands and put them behind my head. "Let me, Bonnie. I want to do this." He kissed me right below my bellybutton and the butterflies in my stomach went wild.

It was amazing, how after all this time, I've never felt more comfortable with him.

His lips and tongue slowly and sensually edged their way down to the waistband of my shorts when he put his hand on either side of my hips and slid them off. He left my panties in place and kissed the insides of my thighs at a leisurely pace. I could feel myself getting wetter by the moment. Every time I felt the warmth of his tongue on my skin, I rolled my hips, hoping to persuade him to put his tongue where I really needed it. He got the hint. I knew because he smiled like a boy who knew he was doing something wrong. When he finally closed his mouth over me, my hands shot straight to his hair and I held on. When he laughed with my pussy in his mouth I moaned so loudly that I'm sure the neighbors heard. He groaned almost animalistically, shoved my panties to the side and gave one wide, long lapping to my clit. My body shook with a second orgasm. "Bonnie, babe, you taste like a fucking dream." He sucked my clit into his mouth again and kept wetly sucking before sticking a finger in me. He was so good at this that it made me nervous; who the hell had he practiced on? I pushed the negative thought out of my head. For the time being, I didn't need to think about anything bad. I wrapped my legs around his neck and shoulders, held on to his head and rode his face. He was fucking good at this. His tongue never strayed away from my clit. He licked and sucked, blew and lapped and when he put a second finger in me and penetrated me deeply, I came a third time. He looked up at me with a face that was gleaming in the light of the candles from my juices. He was perfect. And I hated him for it. Loved him madly, but I still hated him.

He crawled up my body using his elbows, laying little pecks on my ribs and my collarbone before looking me right in the face. "What's wrong?" he asked.

"Nothing." I grabbed his face and kissed him, tasting myself on his lips. He pulled back.

"Bonnie, I just made you come three times and now you look distracted. What's wrong?"

I sighed and let it out. "Jeremy, you can make me come until pigs fly but it doesn't disregard everything else. When you're this good with me, I wonder about where else your mouth has been."

"No Bonnie, when she came back, we kissed. That's it. I'm sorry we did even that much. Is that really what you were thinking?"

I wasn't sure exactly what I had been thinking about, but that was close enough. I was embarrassed. I turned my face from his and used my magic to turn the candles off. I scooted out from under him and got off the bed in search of the panties he had tossed across the room. All of a sudden, I felt self-conscious and I covered myself as best I could with my hands.

I hadn't heard him get up behind me, but I guess now he's the puppy. He found my panties before I did and held them out at me. When I reached for them, he snatched them back and laughed.

"Jeremy, can I have my underwear?"

He smiled a ridiculously large smile and held them above his head. "You have to get them from me."

"Or I could just do this," I chuckled and walked to my dresser to pick out a new pair. "You don't get to be clothed while I'm not."

Still standing and looking disappointed that I beat him at his game, he said "fine" and pulled down his boxers. "There," he announced triumphantly.

I stared at the mess of dark curls above his dick and wanted to slap myself for looking any lower than that. I had known it before, but his cock was big. Good big. Girth and length. A shiver went down my spine. How had I never sat on that thing?

Oh that's right, I spent the summer with Dad's family and then Jeremy cheated on me.

I really needed to stop thinking. Seriously. He's naked in my room. He loves me. He apologized. I can do this.

I put the panties back in the drawer and sauntered towards him, hand outstretched to meet his cock. He groaned when our skin made contact. I stroked him lightly, but just enough. I laid a few soft kisses on his chest. His hands went into my hair and he devoured my mouth. My stroking gained speed and we walked backwards toward the bed.

And my fucking doorbell rang. What time is it? Who would be at my door right now?

I considered ignoring it but with everything going on in Mystic Falls right now, I knew it wasn't going to be a girl scout this late at night.

Jeremy and I sighed at the same time. His mouth cocked to one side in a sort of ironic smile and I shook my head. I let go of his cock begrudgingly and grabbed my robe off the back of my bedroom door. He slipped his jeans on and left them unbuttoned. I stared at his body for a little too long and the doorbell rang again.

"Can we have one night without all hell breaking loose? I'm so tired of this place," Jeremy said to no one in particular as we walked out of my room and down the stairs.

I too had a bad feeling about this.

And although I was a little relieved when I looked out the peephole, I almost wished it was a vampire waiting outside of my door right now.

Shit.


	3. Chapter 3

When Bonnie stepped back slowly from looking out of the peephole, I got worried. Anyone coming by this late couldn't be coming with good news. I stepped around her and ripped the door open.

What. The. Fuck?

He narrowed his eyes at the sight of me and looked suspiciously at Bonnie. I wanted to punch him in the fucking face.

"What the hell do you want?" I asked.

"Jeremy, calm down. Jaime, can I help you with something?"

His bug eyes were playing playing ping pong between Bonnie and I. He reminded me of a bug. I seriously wanted to punch this guy. I put my arm around Bonnie instead.

"I thought you were the one who needed help. I saw your missed call and wanted to come make sure you were alright," Jaime finally said.

"She's fine. You can leave now." I replied. This guy. He could've called instead.

"And I can speak for myself. Sorry Jaime, I needed a ride home from Elena's and Jeremy offered to take me instead. I'm fine. Thank you for coming."

"Yeah, Jeremy gave you a ride, alright. You two didn't even have the decency to get dressed to get the door and now you're rubbing it in my face. You're quite the classy one, Bonnie. I thought you were better than that."

Bonnie grabbed my arm as I reared back to hit this guy. I'm not usually the violent type but this fucker wasn't going to get away with insulting Bonnie in front of me. Macho, I know, but I get really protective of her, what do you want?

Bonnie pulled harder and when I looked at her to tell me to let me go, she was smiling. Not the same kind of smile she gives me, but one that makes me hesitant and curious. I put my arm down and just stared at her.

"Jaime, get off my porch. Don't come back. I don't want to have to be rude."

"What you're being is a bitch right now a—"

Just as I decided I was going to shut his mouth for him, he stopped talking even though his lips were still moving. Surprised, I looked down at Bonnie and saw that her face had taken an ashen color and she was smiling even more wildly now and seemed to be enjoying whatever she was doing to Jaime.

"Jaime, you will get the fuck off my porch right now and you're going to leave town. You're going to forget my number. All you're going to think about when you think of Bonnie Bennett is that she's the daughter Abby left to raise you."

He went from looking like a bug to looking like a fish. His mouth was flapping open and closed and though he seemed to really want to speak, nothing came out. I liked this Jaime much better, but Bonnie was still starting to worry me.

With the final cut of his eyes, Jaime walked backwards toward his car. I slammed the door shut and immediately turned to Bonnie incredulously. "Did you just compel him?"

The smile on her face got bigger and she replied, "something like that. But witchier."


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter 4: Jeremy

"Witchier," I said. "And what exactly does that mean? I've never seen you smile like that doing magic. You didn't even say an incantation. What's going on, Bonnie?"

"I haven't exactly had the time to play around with my magic since this afternoon, Jeremy. What I did to you today, I think it had some side effects."

"What kind of side effects? What are you not telling me?"

She rolled her eyes at me playfully and said, "I told you, I'm not sure. But I feel more powerful. More in control. What just happened with Jaime, it was- I had never done something like that. I was hoping he'd shut up, and an old spell I saw in one of my grimoires popped into my head. It was a sort of _veritas_spell."

We sat down on the couch and she was smiling a little; looking like she'd just aced a hard exam at school. She seemed proud of herself. I couldn't help but to smile too. It had been so long since I saw her happy. I mean, I saw her being all chummy with Jerkoff at that forsaken fucking decades dance, but that I'd rather not think about it. So I wasn't going to.

"Veritas? I've played enough video games and read enough comics to know Veritas means 'truth' or something, so I'm not really following you here, Bon."

"Right. Veritas means truth. The spell is supposed to be used to get the truth out of people who are lying to you. From what I remember reading - and for the sake of disclosure, I totally considered using it on you after I found out about what you did with what's-her-name - it was supposed to make the person sort of spit out the truth unwillingly."

I instinctively put my hand to my throat when she said that. This whole little scenario played out in my head of her asking me what I was doing the time I flipped out at her when I was 13 when she walked into my room to ask me if I had an extra pair of headphones. She still made fun of me for that and I wasn't excited about the idea of telling her the details. I'd probably tell her anything she wanted to know, but that particular moment was one of those moments you look back on and blush, years later.

"Got something else to be worried about, Jeremy?" she asked with a raised eyebrow.

I looked down at the floor and said "headphones." I started cracking up at the memory of me simultaneously throwing the framed picture of Bonnie and Caroline that I'd stolen from Elena across the room and putting my comforter over my lap.

"Oh my God." She began to laugh so hard that she clutched her stomach and threw her legs into the air. It was a beautiful sight.

I let her laugh for a minute and brought us back to the spell. "Don't get any ideas. I'm not ready for that line of questioning. Now, veritas. The spell. What happened?"

"I haven't laughed that hard in so long. Oh man." She took a deep breath to calm herself and continued, "Ok, the veritas spell. While Jamie was standing there ranting, I kept wishing he would shut up and leave, and for whatever reason, I thought of that spell. But when I was saying it in my head, I switched it up. I don't know how or why it occured to me to change the wording, but it ended up having the opposite effect."

Obviously. It looked like that fucker wouldn't have been able to keep talking shit if he had miraculously grown a new pair of lips.

"You were smiling."

"I know," she said with a newly formed smile on her perfect lips. "I just kinda knew that it would work. And it did. I didn't even have to say the words out loud! It was amazing. And I know if I hadn't shut him up, you would have decked him." She was looking me in the eyes with this proud look. She was proud of herself and what else? There was something else there. Was she proud that I'd stood up for her? Hot.

"If you hadn't grabbed me, I would've. And if he ever shows his fucking face in the same vicinity as me, I'm clobbering him. Just telling you now. You looked all hot and borderline evil, so I got distracted."

Her smile faded quickly. "Evil? Really?"

"I mean, yeah, kind of. The color in your face was a little drained and you looked like you were enjoying the shit out of making him shut his fishy face. Don't get me wrong, it was hot, but it did look a little evil."

Her hands went up to her face like she was searching for something on it. She put on the worried face I'd seen way too often since my sister started playing with vampires. The same face I saw before she stopped my heart and countless other times. I hated seeing her worry. It made me want to fight the whole fucking world. Sometimes I think we all forget how young we are; that we should not be making faces like that in high school. Those faces are reserved for parents and and other adults. We shouldn't be making faces like that because we've lost our parents and our livelihoods are threatened on a daily basis. Bonnie and I have both been dead before and our lives have only gotten worse since then. Either way, right now I have to get this look off of her face.

"Babe," I turned to face her on the couch and grabbed her hands from her face. I wove my fingers through her little ones and brought them to my lips to kiss them. "Don't worry about it. You've done a helluva lot of a lot of magic today. You didn't have a nosebleed and you've gotten them for way less. I'm guessing that's a sign that you're getting more powerful, but you still need to rest. That's all it is. Let's go to sleep, ok? We can worry about whatever else when we wake up."

"You know, one of the things I missed the most about you was that you're the only one who ever worries about me. I love my friends, you know I do, but I've been so lonely since you..." She sighed and skipped over the part we both knew well. "Everyone's so caught up. Elena with Stefan and Damon, if Caroline's not planning something at school, she's inhaling Tyler's face, I love Matt, but he's always working and I never want to pile onto his troubles. So, when we're done saving the world or Elena, everyone goes back to where they came from and we barely speak unless something bad's going on. You and I, we went through the bad together for a while. We made an awesome team."

"We still make an awesome team, Bonnie." I got up, put one arm behind her back, the other under her thighs and picked her up. The smile she gave me was one of the purest things I'd ever seen. After everything I'd done, she still loved me. Judging from that smile, she loved the _shit_ out of me. She put her hands on the back of my neck and I brought my face down to kiss her. Her lips were soft and she smelled like sex and lavender. Bonnie Bennett is the love of my life. I hate even thinking something as cheesy as that, but there are no other words to describe it. And I'll be damned if I ever let her go again.

When we got to her room, I set her down and took off her robe. She stared up at me with a quizzical smirk on her face when I brushed up against her breasts while I was doing it. I smiled at her and kissed her again. She got into bed and I followed. I layed on my back, opened my arms and she cuddled up into me, her head using my arm as a pillow and her bare skin on mine. I hadn't felt this peaceful in ages. I waited until she fell asleep and drifted off thinking that the day could not have ended up any better. This was pretty perfect.

So when I nearly had a heart attack because Bonnie shook me awake freaking out after what felt like 5 minutes of the most serene sleep of my life, the first thought in my head was "of course."


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter 5: Bonnie

Deja Vu. As if violently shaking Jeremy awake once in a day wasn't enough to go through. "Jeremy, wake up!"

This time at least, he came to quickly. Breathlessly and a little more freaked out, but he woke up nonetheless.

"What's wrong? What happened?"

"You need to go back home. Right now." I got up and started collecting our clothes from the floor.

"What did I do?" he asked groggily, still in bed, rubbing his eyes all too casually.

"Jeremy, there's something wrong with Elena. I had a weird dream and I have a really bad feeling. We need to go check on her."

He jumped out of bed instantly and got dressed with a silent determination.

"What happened in the dream, Bonnie? The Originals? Alaric?"

"No, no. More mundane than that, but I still have a bad feeling. We were at cheer practice and she collapsed. Your parents were there too. So were you. We all started trying to wake her up and she wouldn't. Stefan and Damon were there. They looked like they had at the dance, like they were behind some barrier they couldn't see but were trying to break down. Things got dark and I woke up. I know it doesn't sound like much, but it was enough to wake me up terrified and I'm not going to ignore that."

Both dressed, we rushed downstairs to put our shoes on and leave. He looked solemn and worried as hell. As we reached the door, he turned to me abruptly and gave me a quick peck on the lips. "Bonnie, do me a favor?"

Uh oh. "What?"

"Stay here. Whatever's wrong with Ele-"

"Are you out of your mind? No way I'm staying here. No fucking way, Jeremy."

"Babe, whatever's wrong with Elena, there's not much that my ring can't take care of. Your house is protected. You and Grams made it one of the safest places in town. Please, Bonnie. The sun will be up in a little while, so we won't have to deal with too many vampires. I just need you safe. Please. Please. If it's bad, just meet me at the house."

"Jeremy, I'm not a fucking baby or some kind of wilting flower. I can take care of myself. I can keep us safe."

"I know that, but if you have to worry about Elena and me too, and if I have to worry about the two of you... Just Bonnie, please? I'm begging you. Give me the peace of mind to know that you're safe and not sacrificing yourself for once? Especially after tonight. Please?"

He looked so sad that I reluctantly gave in. I knew something had happened to Elena, but I also knew that witches weren't involved and I had a feeling that vampires weren't either. The likelihood that werewolves were back was slim, so it might have been a human problem. "Fine, Jeremy. I don't think there's anything supernatural at play. Call me as soon as you get there."

He nodded, kissed me again and ran to his car. I closed the front door when the screech of his tires subsided and I couldn't see his car on the street anymore. I closed my eyes and sent out a protection spell to engulf him. Wish I'd done it in before he ran off to his car, but I'm sure it would work anyway.

With nothing to do but wait, I paced like a madwoman.


	6. Chapter 6

**For the next few chapters I'll be giving a Beremy-centric account of 3x22, the season finale. I found it incredibly lacking, so I wanted to weave this story into it and give A LOT more detail on what Bonnie and Jeremy were doing. Again, feedback is encouraged! This is my first fic ever, so I like to know how I'm doing. Thanks to all those that have reviewed! Appreciate you all!**

* * *

I had imagined that when I finally left Bonnie's house, the ride home would be straight out of a movie. I'd have the window down, the sun would be shining, my speakers would be blaring some god-awful pop rock song about feeling good and I'd be smiling, thinking back on the portion of my night spent with Bonnie.

What's actually happening now though? Not so much. The last time I drove home this fast from Bonnie's house was when her father came back from D.C. and interrupted a very heavy makeout/dry-hump session. Needless to say, the blueballs I was dealing with needed some immediate relief. I'm still fairly certain that I'm driving faster now.

Elena.

Fuck. I told her I'd protect her. And now, if Bonnie's feeling was right, I'd failed her. I skidded to a halt in the driveway and ran to the door. I locked it behind me and did a quick check of the house. No one was downstairs. Things were as quiet as they should be this late. When I was sure things were safe downstairs, I ran upstairs, taking three steps at a time. I almost knocked Elena's bedroom door off its hinges, only to find her bed empty and still made up.

"Elena!"

No answer.

"ELENA!"

I checked the bathroom, then my room. Empty. I ran across the hall to Alaric's room.

My heart stopped for the second time in less than 24 hours. My sister was splayed out on the floor. The blood that had spilled from her nose dried on her right cheek and mouth. The paint she knocked over was on her shirt. She looked dead.

"Elena!" I ran over to her body and shook her. When she wouldn't wake up, I put her on her back and did some rescue breathing that I learned the summer Matt and Bonnie were lifeguards. I was still in my short-lived Matt is God stage then. When I got no response, I tried again. My face was wet and salty. I hadn't even realized I was crying.

Everything about how I was reacting was so robotic. I was on auto-pilot and everything was moving in slow motion. It's like my brain couldn't handle what it was seeing and just gave me commands. Shake her, it told me. Try artificial breathing again, it said. Call 911, it finally told me.

I took out my phone and saw Bonnie had called four times already. I dialed 911. I'm not even sure what I told them. Everything was blank. My parents, Aunt Jenna, Vicky, Anna, Alaric and now my sister? I was only now getting Bonnie back in my life. No, not my sister too. She had a pulse. She was breathing. I wasn't going to lose her. I couldn't. It wasn't going to happen. And I still had to argue with her about Colorado. Brother and sister stuff. I rocked back and forth with Elena in my arms until the EMTs pounded on the door. I took off my jacket and put it under her head, kissed her forehead and went downstairs to let them in.

"What happened to her?" the puny EMT asked while he was loading her onto the stretcher.

Oh, nothing, just the usual. She almost slit her own throat to call SuperVampireAlaric's bluff. Then had nearly all the blood in her body drained by a dickhead hybrid Original. Then she was thrown into a dresser by aforementioned dickhead hybrid Original. Oh, and then she drank lots of tequila. All while mourning the death (and apparent vampire rebirth) of her only living guardian. Normal teenager shit.

"She uh, she donated blood today. And drank, and then she tripped and hit her head. She was fine after though. She was painting a room upstairs last I saw her. I went out and when I came back home, she was on the floor."

"She lost blood. She drank. She fell. She _painted_. Genius. And you left her?"

I was going to lose my fucking mind. Everyone seemed to want to play _How__Much__Horrible__Shit__Can__We__Say__To__Jeremy__Before__He__Pounds__Someone__'__s__Face__In_ today.

"Listen, fuckwad. Today is not the day to fuck with me or my sister. Do what the fuck you came here to do. Help her. Or so help me God, I'm going to hurt you."

He looked down at my balled up fist, signaled to his partner and started the descent downstairs. The other EMT tried to hide his chuckling and I cut my eyes at him so violently, his smug smile disappeared and all of a sudden he was preoccupied with tightening the belts around Elena's body.

They loaded her into the ambulance, secured an oxygen mask around her face and retook her vitals.

"What's wrong with her?" I asked

The little runt EMT, whose name I gathered was Josh from his uniform answered, "She did too much, dude. She fainted. She probably hasn't been out that long and probably won't be for much longer. They'll do a CT Scan to check for concussion, cranial bleeding, things like that. They'll start her on an IV drip. She'll be fine."

Well, that made me feel a little better. And at least he wasn't being a tool anymore. "Thanks."

I took out my phone again. Bonnie had sent me about ten text messages, all variations of "call me back, I'm worried." I smiled at the last one she sent that said, "Jeremy, if u don't respond within 5 minutes, I'm going to stop ur heart permanently!"

I dialed her number and put the phone to my ear. She picked up half a second into the first ring, "Oh thank goodness. I'm going to strangle you when I see you, Jeremy. What happened?"

Josh heard her screaming at me and chuckled.

"Bonnie, she's going to be fine. Everything she did today took a toll on her. She passed out. I'm in the ambulance with her now headed to the hospital."

She let out a big breath that told me that she was relieved. "Ok, I'm gonna meet you there. Or am I still banned from leaving my house?" she asked sarcastically.

I chuckled a little. Leave it to Bonnie to add humor to any of this. That's supposed to be my role.

"I'll be there in 20 minutes, Jeremy. Have you called Meredith yet? Is she going to see Elena?"

"Good question. I'll call her now. See you soon."

* * *

As I was walking back to Elena's hospital room from the cafeteria, I saw Jeremy hang up the phone. He was fine when I left to get us coffee but now he looked worried again.

We were exhausted. The night of the dance was a wreck and I don't think any of us slept much. I had Jaime stay with me, and I got to sleep for a little while before Esther sicked the Ancestors on me. I felt bad for leading Jaime on, but whatever. Wasn't going to have to deal with him anymore.

Yesterday, we dessicated Klaus and Jeremy and I reconciled (for the most part) and I know that between the two of us, we haven't slept more than six hours in the last two days. But the look on his face right now tells me we won't be getting to sleep any time soon.

I quickened my pace to get to Jeremy and he did the same. I handed him his coffee and waited for him to speak. In a hushed voice he said, "Stefan and Damon said we need to get her out of here ASAP. They're right. It's open season on her while she's here. I should've thought of that before. I should've just -"

"Jeremy, please. You did what you had to and it was the right thing to do. It's not like Stefan and Damon are in Mystic Falls right now anyway. What were you supposed to do? Wait a couple of hours for them to come back? No." I put my free hand on his cheek. "You did what you had to and there's nothing to feel bad about. But we should get her out. Call Matt. I'll call Caroline and Tyler. We'll need all the help we can get."

Naturally, or supernaturally, rather, Caroline and Tyler were the first to arrive. I dimmed the lights in the hall outside Elena's room and put a deflecting spell around us that would make people in the hospital avoid coming our way until we had Elena safely in the car. Matt pulled up just as we were helping her into Caroline's backseat.

Matt seemed like he was on a mission. "Sorry I'm late. I was sleeping the tequila off. Jeremy, you look like shit. The cook's at the Grille taking inventory. Go ask him to make you something. We got it from here. The spare key's still on top of the molding of the front door?"

Jeremy looked at Matt, then at me and defeatedly looked at the ground. "Yeah."

"Jeremy, if you don't want to separate, we don't have to. If you're hungry, I'll take you to the Grille. It's up to you." I tried to reassure him. I could see that the guilt was swallowing him alive. He was bound to get reckless or crawl into a ball. Jeremy operated in the extremes most days. I wanted to do all I could to keep him level.

Matt narrowed his eyes and looked back and forth between Jeremy and I. He looked so confused that I laughed. He opened his mouth to say something and shut it promptly when Jeremy took my hand.

Matt smiled, threw his hands up to the sky and yelled, "Thank you!"

Jeremy and I laughed so hard that Caroline, Tyler and Elena looked to us from their seats in the car. Caroline squealed like she had just been given a new pair of shoes, Tyler smiled and gave us a thumbs up and Elena smiled as widely as she could, still being out of it.

"Oh, I'm _so_ going to need an update," Caroline declared from the driver's seat.

I smiled, nodded and looked back at Jeremy. "What do you want to do?"

Jeremy looked at Elena in the car and said, "Let's go pick up some food. Neither of us have eaten in hours and I'll get something for Elena too."

Matt clapped Jeremy on the back, said a few encouraging words and headed to his truck. Jeremy and I got into my car and drove to the Grille.

* * *

I was waiting in the car for Jeremy to get the food when I heard my phone playing Cobra Starship's _Good__Girls__Gone__Bad_. I hated it, but Caroline insisted the song was about her.

I picked up and said, "Caroline," expectantly.

"Tell me EVERYTHING."

I giggled. Caroline _would_ insist on hearing about my love life while we were all in a panic. "What about Elena?"

"Oh, she's fine. Stephan just showed up and Matt's still there, so Tyler and I left. We're on the way back to my house. Now, every detail, please."

"You're a mess, Caroline."

"A perfectly put together mess, if there ever was one. Yes, thank you. Go."

"Well, you got me drunk and then left me on Elena's couch, so it's all your fault."

"I am amazing, aren't I?"

I love Caroline Forbes. I really do. "Ok, I'll give you the short version now and we can catch up this week. So, Jeremy woke me up and offered me a ride home. It was really awkward in the car, but then he started spilling about everything that happened with freakin' ghost girl and..."

"And? Did he confess his undying love for you?"

"Actually, yeah, he did, Caroline."

"Ohmygod, ohmygod, I knew it Bonnie! I totally freaking knew it. Tyler! Jeremy loves Bonnie! Yay! We have to double da-"

"Hold on, Caroline. We still have things to work out. But yeah, he dropped me off and then showed back up like ten minutes later and, um, well, things happened."

Caroline did her little squeal thing again. "You're lucky Tyler's in the car with me. But you definitely owe me a very, very detailed account. Shit, Bonnie, hold on, my mom's calling me."

She clicked over and I checked my watch. Jeremy had been in the Grille for longer than I'd expected. How much food was he getting? I know he can eat like a linebacker but damn.

When Caroline clicked back to me and sounded out of breath. "Bon, I gotta go. My mom just called me freaking out telling us to meet her at Tyler's. She sounded stressed but she wouldn't tell me what was going on."

Jeremy was right, nothing ever goes smoothly in Mystic Falls. Ever. "Do you want me and Jeremy to meet you there?"

"No, Bon, we should be fine between the two of us. I'll call you after I find out what's wrong."

"Be safe, Caroline. Make sure you call me."

I hung up the phone and checked my watch again. Why would Sheriff Forbes be freaking out? That wasn't good. The only time I hear anything about her, it has something to do with the Council and vampires. I picked up my phone to call Stefan to tell him about it and ask for an update on Elena when I saw Jeremy come running to my car with a big bag of food and looking like he was terrified. I reached over and threw the passenger side door open.

He got in, breathing heavily and said, "Alaric. Drive. Now."


	7. Chapter 7

**I've made a few minor changes throughout. Trying to be as consistent with the season finale as possible and it's quite the task. I can't wait to get passed the finale so I can move on to my hypothetical season 4! Enjoy this for now. Already working on Chapter 8.**

* * *

So I sped off. Probably too quickly for anyone's health. Luckily MFPD was nowhere in sight. Dammit. Tonight had been relatively normal. I got drunk. Jeremy and I basically made up and we were pretty intimate. Elena passed out, but for logical reasons, and Caroline and I had some girl talk. This was one of the most teenager-y nights I'd had in a while. What Jeremy had just said served as a reminder that nothing ordinary ever lasts long in Mystic Falls. I was sick to death of those kind of reminders.

We couldn't even get a reprieve now that Klaus had been put down.

Looking at Jeremy, I could tell he was sick of the "nothing's ever normal" reminders too. He was spent. But we could wish for normal lives and die waiting around for them or we could handle all the shit constantly being piled on our plates in the present. "Jeremy, what the hell just happened?"

Jeremy looked at the bag of food in his lap blankly. "Alaric was in there. He's going after Klaus, Bonnie. He wanted me to tell him where the body is."

My heart was breaking seeing him like this. I didn't know if I was more sad, scared or fed up. Maybe a delicate balance of all three? And I know he wasn't prepared to see Alaric that way. He didn't have time to mourn his death before he found out Alaric had become an overzealous, self-hating Super!Vampire-vampire hunter. I kept my left hand on the steering wheel and put my right hand on the nape of Jeremy's neck.

"What did you say to him?"

"I mostly listened. He was talking about wiping out all vampires and giving Elena a normal life. He mentioned you desiccating him when he was done wiping them out." He took my hand from his neck and kissed it, then he sighed and let his head fall back onto the headrest. "I thought about helping him, Bonnie." He took another deep breath before he said, "I'm sorry."

I snatched my hand away from him. I knew how much it hurt him to admit that to himself, much less aloud. We all wanted normal lives but helping Alaric meant killing my mother. "Abby is a lot of things, Jeremy, but she's still my mom."

"I know that."

"You can't help him, Jeremy. I know you love Elena and Alaric, but she's my mother," I insisted again. I guess we're going to have to work on that trust thing.

He turned to me and said, "Yeah, I love them, but I love you too, Bonnie. You really think I would do that to you? After everything _you__'__ve_ been through and everything you've lost, you think I'd put you through more hurt than I already have? I know our friends like to act like Elena's the only one with problems, but I'm not them. I would never do that to you. And I wouldn't do that to Elena or Caroline and Tyler either. I only thought about it for a second, Bonnie. I'm not going to help him."

I took a deep breath and nodded, reassured. "So what do we do?"

"I'm not entirely -"

My phone interrupted him. I saw Damon's name on the screen and I raked my fingers through my hair. I couldn't deal with him right now. Damon was a ruiner of good things. Not that any of this was good, but I was positive they'd only get worse now.

I put phone on speaker and threw the phone in my lap. "Damon, this is a really bad time."

"When isn't it a bad time? You'll never guess what your idiot best friend just did."

"Watch it, dick," Jeremy broke in.

"Oh-ho, you've been a busy girl lately, huh Bonnie? Hmm, I bet Idiot number 2 couldn't handle seeing you with the new guy and just _had_ to get you back? Jeremy, where's the ghost of the ex-girlfriend past? She was cute. Ish. If you're into that whole looking 12 for all of eternity thing."

While I had to admit insulting Anna was a nice touch, I can't fucking stand Damon. I hung up the phone when he kept berading us.

Jeremy looked like he was going to lose it. His hands were balled up in his lap and he was biting his lower lip, most likely to keep from snapping. When Damon called back, I took longer to pick up.

"Damon, behave yourself or I'll keep hanging up. What do you want?"

"You're too wound up, Bonnie. I was almost done making fun of you guys. But like I was saying, _Elena_ just gave up Klaus' body to the Originals."

"She what?" I pulled over into an empty lot to collect my thoughts and not crash into anything. I was seething. Why would she do that? That's not a decision she should have made on her own. Klaus was a danger to everyone, not just her. There should have been a vote. Something.

Jeremy shook his head in disbelief. He must have been thinking along the same lines. "What's the catch, Damon? She wouldn't just disregard all the shit he's done or how hard it was to lock him up. Did she forget I had to die for Klaus to be dessicated or?"

"Or. Definitely or. Do you see why I called her an idiot now? The terms of the deal were that for Klaus' body, Elena would be safe and the Originals would run away. Elijah, by the way, he's back, said they wouldn't wake him for a few generations."

I couldn't believe how selfish this all sounded. "_Elena_ will be safe?"

"I mean, I'm not complaining about that, but I have to say, I must not be rubbing off on her as much as I thought. Besides the fact that I was on the phone screaming "no" like I was a toddler at the dentist, I really thought she'd pick up on the fact that Elijah only specifically said she'd be safe."

"Well, didn't you just say that they'd leave Mystic Falls? Maybe she figured we'd all be safe if that happens." Jeremy interjected.

"That Gilbert stupid gene is strong in the two of you. You sure you aren't brother and sister biologically? She still made a deal with an Original. Nothing good will come of that. And it's not like they're necessarily getting rid of our Alaric problem, either."

"Who Jeremy just ran into at the Grille."

"You think you should've mentioned that earlier? What happened, Jeremy?"

"He's going after Klaus. He wanted me to tell him where the body is."

"Well, seeing as how I've killed you before and you caught me making out with your sister in Colorado, I'm glad you don't know where it is."

"Whoa, what? Why don't I know this?" Elena, the ever-open best friend. Figures.

Damon and Jeremy both chose to ignore me this time. "I'm not going to help him, Damon. I hate you, but I'm sure someone out there cares for you."

"How refreshing. Bonnie, how quickly can you be in Norfolk?"

Damon's nonchalant admission of harming Jeremy and making out with Elena had distracted me. In this moment, I didn't know the girl that was supposed to be my best friend. Between giving Klaus up without taking anyone else into account and the fact that Damon could admit to killing her brother and making out with her in one sentence, it just... I don't have the words. Not to mention everything he'd done to Caroline. And there's always the fact that Damon killed and turned Abby. Damon's killed her brother and her best friend's mother and she still made out with him. Damon was horrible and Elena chose to what, ignore everything bad he'd done? Where was her loyalty? I mean, the only time I ever put up with Damon is when he share a common interest, and even then I've considered hurting him.

"Bonnie?" Jeremy put his hand on my knee and was staring at me nervously. His touch snapped me out of it.

Damon chimed in again. "Bonnie? Norfolk? How long?"

"Damon, first of all, why would I meet you anywhere? And second, you really are a moron if that's where you put Klaus' body. It's the first place outside of Mystic Falls anyone would look."

"Oh come on, Busy Bonnie, you know we work well together. And I don't recall telling you the body is in Norfolk. I just told you to meet me there. I need your witchy juju to throw Alaric off the scent. Especially if he's resourceful enough to recruit himself a witch."

"Unlikely considering you'd need Original blood to track Klaus' body. Alaric isn't exactly in cahoots with any of them."

"As far as we know. You going to do this or not? You know the consequences of Klaus being skewered by Alaric better than anyone."

I sighed and said, "I need to get my shit together, Damon. I'll leave in an hour."

"An _hour_? Sure, take your time, it's not like Norfolk isn't at least an hour and a half away or anything."

"I mean if you insist on telling me what to do, I could just stay here and be Busy Bonnie with Jeremy instead."

I hung up and threw my phone on the dashboard. Things were quiet in the car on the way to Jeremy's. I looked at him again. The silence was getting awkward and I had no intention of letting us get back to that place. "What, Jeremy?"

"I hate this."

* * *

All of it. Bonnie having to leave, Alaric being what he was, Elena constantly putting herself and everyone in danger over two fucking vampires who were more trouble than they were worth. Stefan was alright again, but if it was a packaged deal, I'd prefer neither.

And what the fuck was going on with Bonnie getting all upset at the mention of Elena and Damon making out?

"I don't want you to meet up with Damon."

"I don't either, but I don't have much of a choice. Klaus needs to stay alive." I knew that, but I still had to say something.

"You seemed pretty upset about him and Elena."

"I'm going to ignore the accusation in your tone, because with all that Damon's done, you should know better."

"His track record didn't stop Elena."

"Yeah, and that's what I was pissed about. How could she?"

I had a flashback to the hotel and all the bullshit Rose told me and shook my head . "I think she's in love with him too." If Damon were to ever compel me again, I'd request he erase that night from my memory. A man never needs to see his big sister sucking face. Much less sucking face with the vampire who had killed him during a hissy fit.

Bonnie's only reaction to that was "Ugh."

Ditto.

The closer we got to my house, the more antsy I became. Elena's skeevy love life was pushed out of my mind by my thoughts of Bonnie. Bonnie was putting herself in harm's way again. What if Alaric showed up? Could Damon keep her safe and keep Klaus' body from Alaric? I knew that if it came down to protecting Bonnie or Klaus' body, Damon would choose whatever kept him alive.

Bonnie pulled into the driveway next to my car. She sat there rubbing her face, far away in her own head. What a way to end a more than decent night.

"Will you call Matt and tell him to meet us outside?"

I felt the crease in my forehead form. I wasn't sure where this was going.

But like a good hopeful future boyfriend (again), I did as she asked. When Matt came out to the driveway, his first words were, "Elena gave up Klaus'-"

"We know," Bonnie and I said at the same time. Matt almost seemed disappointed that we had already heard. It was hard being the only person in a group without some sort of "extra."

Bonnie must have been strategizing in the car because when she spoke, she had a plan. "Matt, I'm going to meet Damon to conceal the body. You two need to protect Elena. As mad as I am at her right now, I don't want her to get hurt. Vampires have a history of using her as a bartering chip. And since Alaric knows she's his lifeline and the number of Originals in town has risen, he may decide to hold onto her to keep himself alive. And both of you, be careful. Jeremy, you're not allowed to die on me again."

I pulled Bonnie in for a hug and Matt got the hint. "well, that's my queue to leave. Bonnie, be careful." He grabbed the food out of my hands and jogged back to the house.

She smiled at him from under my arms and then looked up at me. "Your food."

"Please, I lost my appetite as soon as you mentioned Alaric." She ended her sentence with a smirk.

I really did hate this. It felt wrong. It felt like a goodbye. I ran my fingers through her dark hair. She rested her head on my chest silently and tightened her arms around my sides. My nerves were shot to hell."I just got you back. This is bullshit."

"I know."

"Bonnie, you have to be careful. If it's you or Klaus, Damon will choose survival."

"I know."

She wasn't saying enough. "What are you going to do?"

"Shower first. Never got a chance to wash you off of me." She looked up and me and raised her eyebrow. As much as I didn't need to be thinking about Bonnie naked and moaning right now, she laughed when she felt my cock stir against her belly. "Then I'm going to have to go through Abby's grimoires to find something to conceal Klaus."

"Abby's?"

"I think it was the one good thing she's ever done for me. When she came to give me the spell to dessicate Klaus, she gave me all of her old grimoires. She said she didn't need them anymore. There's some pretty complex stuff in there.

My stomach tightened at the mention of Abby again. I had to say it this time. "Bonnie, I'm sorry about Abby. I wish I had been there for you. No one told me."

"You would've known if you had bothered to keep in contact with me."

She was right. I didn't deserve to be embracing her right now. When I started to back away, she tightened her hold again, sighed and continued, "we'll have plenty of time to argue when I get back. Don't you dare let go of me right now."

I kissed the top of her head. "You should get going." I took off my ring behind her back and held it to her face. "Take it."

"We've been through this, Jeremy."

"What? You mean you sacrificing your well-being to protect everyone else's?"

She shook her head. "And you trying to give me the ring." She took a step back, looked at the ring in my outstretched palm and closed her little fingers around it. I got excited thinking she'd finally agreed to take it, but she slid it back on my finger and said "Contego."

"What did you do, Bonnie? Did you just propose to me?"

I needed to see her laugh before she left and I succeeded. "We're _so_ no there yet. It'll stay on your finger for a day. Please don't get killed while I'm gone. I gotta go." She tippy toed and laid a light kiss on my lips and turned to walk away. Not enough.

I grabbed her arm gently and pulled her back in for a real kiss. Our tongues met softly. There was a silent desperation, almost a silent goodbye in the kiss. When we parted, I put my hand on her face and my forehead against hers. She had tears in her eyes. I wiped them away and said, "Bonnie, you better come back to me."

"You better be in one piece when I do. Stay away from Alaric."

I took her hand and walked her to her car. I went inside when her tail lights disappeared into the night.

Now to do something about Elena.


	8. Chapter 8

I ran my hand across the page when I found it. This was the spell I'd use tonight. Feeling conflicted, I sent a silent thank you to Abby for giving me her grimoires. I could hate her as my mother, but I couldn't help but to respect her as a witch. The grimoire that was currently in my lap was a collection of spells that I despised. I despised them not only because they were dangerous, but because the way my life was going, I could tell I'd be using a lot of them. They were the kind of spells Abby presumptuously warned me about.

The nerve of her. She had no idea what her abandonment had created in me. I had grown up without a mother and a father that subtely treated me like a freak for having her genes. Abby's absence had made me hard out of necessity. And the one person I had that would've let me flourish and be a child was Grams and Dad kept me from her as much as he could. And now she was gone. I missed her. I needed her in my corner. I knew she was on the Other Side watching and I wondered what she thought of all this. I looked down at the grimoire again and could imagine her telling me to find another way; that the witches would not be pleased. But I didn't see another way. I couldn't lose anyone else.

I read the spell over and over until I had it memorized. It was long and it was difficult. It was going to take a lot of power. Power that before today, I wouldn't have had. But I knew after this afternoon that I'd be able to handle it. I'm not sure how I knew, why I was so certain, but I felt it. When I looked through the grimoire, there was nothing in there about it and Abby said the dessication spell would make me tap into dark places but not this feeling of strength. This didn't feel dark. It felt good. Did Abby feel like this after she dessicated Mikael? It wasn't the first time that I wished I could talk to my mother, it might not even by the last, but I wasn't going to do it. I survived growing up without her, I could do this without her too. But I did wish there was someone I could talk to about it. Some family. Because when all was said and done, stopping Jeremy's heart had made me stronger. And while I felt powerful and I felt good, it made me nervous.

But there wasn't time for me to get sappy and lonely right now. I had the spell I needed, and now it was time for action. I dialed Tyler's number.

Before I got a word in, he told me about Alaric telling the Council about what he and Caroline were. "I need to protect her, Bonnie. We're supposed to leave town but I know she won't. She'll never leave you guys. If we can't get to Alaric, he's going to kill Klaus." He stopped speaking but we both knew what would happen should Klaus die. Tyler was terrified.

And that's how I knew he'd help me do this. He was scared for Caroline, not for himself. He knew he'd die too, but so long as Caroline was alright, he was satisfied.

"How much are you willing to sacrifice, Tyler? Because this won't be easy."

"Anything. Everything."

That made me smile. I knew Caroline would do the same for him. "Alright. Meet me in the cellar in 20 minutes. I'm going to need some blood."

* * *

I was almost in Norfolk and I was still turning the vial of Tyler's blood in my hand. I may not be as powerful and seasoned as Esther or Maddox, but I was smart. If I was going to do something as grave as possesing Tyler's body with Klaus' spirit, I was going to have an insurance policy.

Blood magic is potent. I remember Grams used to tell me stories about some of our ancestors that used their blood to make men love them. Blood can link two people like nothing else can. And Klaus having Tyler's blood in him will seal the spell.

With my eyes on the road, I opened the vial of Tyler's blood and with one hand on the wheel I grabbed a vial of my own blood out of my purse. I ripped the stopper out with my teeth and began pouring my blood into his.

_Meum __sanguine __est __nexus__, __sanguine __est __funem__. __Vita __sistit__, __perimo __exemplar__._

And because the forces of nature wouldn't let me be great tonight, I dropped the vial with mine and tyler's blood in it when my phone started blaring _I __hate __you __so __much __right __now _from my passenger seat. Classic Kelis. I guess I'd have to change his ringtone eventually. But it wouldn't be tonight.

"FUCK."

I felt on the floor for the vial and brought it up to the light. I had gotten blood on my carpet, but there was still a little less than half left. I guess the forces of nature had spared me.

And my phone rang again. "Jeremy fucking Gilbert."

I sealed the vial and grabbed my phone. "I could kill you. Seriously."

He chuckled. "What did I do?"

"Um, only almost made me ruin the thing that's going to save everyone's lives."

"Oops."

"Oops? Oops, Jeremy? Why the hell are you in such a good mood?"

"Does it count as kidnapping if she's your sister?"

I almost laughed. Almost. "What did you and Matt do?"

"Well, I just lied to Alaric and told him that Klaus' body was someone else, lessening your chances of running into him. You're very welcome, my love. And Matt and I just planned whisking my sister out of town. We're getting her away from all of this shit for a while. I'll be staying here, of course, to give Ms. Bonnie Bennett the welcome home she deserves."

His cockiness was astounding. And I loved it. He'd done well. Very well. He was lucky there was still blood in that vial or I wouldn't be feeling so proud.

I could hear the smile in his voice when he said, "But now that we've established that I've solved all immediate problems in Mystic Falls, how is your night going? Did you find the spell to conceal Klaus?"

"_That__'__s_ an understatement."

"Bonnie?"

"I'm doing more than concealing him, Jer. Alaric isn't going to be chasing his tail forever and Klaus is almost less dangerous alive and kicking."

"Bonnie, you know I know that. Why are you beating around the bush? What are you going to do? I'm starting to get anxious."

"Should Alaric kill Klaus, Klaus will survive."

"Bonnie, tell me! How is he supposed to survive with the fucking Optimus Prime of stakes in his heart?"

I took a deep breath. This wasn't going to go over well. "You can't tell anyone, Jeremy. Swear to me."

"I swear, now spit it out."

"I talked to Tyler. Alaric outed him and Caroline to the Council. He wanted me to make sure she stays alive. At all costs. Jeremy, if Klaus gets killed, he'll posses Tyler until I can find a way to fix his body."

Silence was the only thing that met my words.


	9. Chapter 9

I got her back like two seconds ago. I wasn't even sure if we were back together, actually. Either way, it was way too fucking early to be fighting with Bonnie.

Red dress. Black dress. Elena didn't need her cheerleading outfit, did she? I don't know how I ended up drawing the short stick, but while Matt was downstairs distracting Elena, I was stuck packing a bag for her. Her closet didn't deserve what I was doing to it. I was pulling things from their hangers and throwing them into a duffel bag. What do girls need? I was too distracted for this shit.

And of course, it was Bonnie I was distracted by. I hated her plan. If anyone found out that Bonnie was going to have this much power over Klaus, she'd have a huge target on her back. She'd put herself in a position where she could guarantee everyone's safety, and even her own, but she'd only be safe if the secret was kept. If anyone found out they could kill Klaus by killing Bonnie... I didn't even want to think about it.

She finally hung up on me when I couldn't give her any new, logical reason to be so opposed to the possession spell. I kept saying "If anyone finds out, Bonnie," and her response was always, "But you said you wouldn't tell anyone. And not liking it isn't enough reason for me not to do this" And she was right. I had no problem keeping her secret. I wasn't a stranger to secrets. This one seemed like it would be the first that was really worth keeping.

Damn, Elena needed underwear didn't she? How did I get stuck doing this again? There's was no way in hell I was touching Elena's underwear, so I yanked out the drawer she kept them in and turned it over, dumping its contents into the bag. I ran to the closet again, grabbed a pair of sneakers, a pair of pink flip flops and the first pair of heels I saw. Fuck it, I gave her a little variety. This should be good enough. I snuck downstairs, went quietly through the back door and put the bag in the bed of Matt's truck.

I cringed when the back door creaked when I came back in. I heard Matt start coughing in the living room like he'd choked on something to keep Elena's attention away from the noise. Distraction 101. He wouldn't be winning an Oscar anytime soon, but his faked fit did the job. I heard Elena in the kitchen getting a glass of water for him as soon as I hit the stairs. Smooth son of a bitch. My sister was fresh out of the hospital and she was the one getting Matt water. I'd be upset about it if he hadn't done it to cover my ass.

I made my way upstairs and to my room without a sound. I should feel the least bit accomplished, having prepared a getaway for Elena, diverting Alaric off Bonnie's trail, but I didn't. I was walking a path into the hardwood floor from pacing back and forth so much. All that was left for me to do was wait. Wait for Elena to be hurried away and for Bonnie to get back to Mystic Falls. I took my phone out of my pocket to check for any word from Bonnie. Nothing.

Maybe Bonnie shouldn't come back to Mystic Falls. Maybe she should just meet up with Elena until things were calm and Alaric was dead. With her being the "harness," as she so aptly called it, between Tyler and Klaus, it would serve her well to be out of town for a while. I could drive down and meet with the two of them.

All the ruminating was in vain though. I knew Bonnie wouldn't go for it. And I wasn't about to be the guy making decisions about her life. She'd had enough of that already. As much as I hated her putting this much of a burden on herself, I knew that one of the only ways to get her to trust me again was to show some trust in her. If she thought she could handle it, I knew she could.

And so one train of thought grinded to a halt and another, much more pleasant one took its place. This one also involved Bonnie. And all the things we'd be doing when she got back. I stopped pacing, grabbed a towel and headed to the bathroom to shower.

* * *

"You should burn in hell. But if you die, so do my friends. So does my mother. What am I supposed to do about that?"

I'm not sure why, but I waited for a response. Any response. Maybe a flaring of the eyes or a few extra blinks. Anything. And I was disappointed and annoyed when I didn't get one. Time to cut the crap.

I threw my hand in the direction of the storage locker door and spelled it so no noise escaped. I only had a few minutes before Damon came strolling back and I didn't need that precious time cut short because he could hear what I was up to.

I took out the three candles I bought from my purse and placed them around the coffin. One for Klaus, one for Tyler, one for me. I dug in my purse again for my dad's swiss army knife, the vial of blood and then let my magic light the candles.

I took a breath, preparing myself to move forward with the plan. I looked back down at Klaus' dessicated body. His eyes still watched me with an intensity that would've made me nervous a week ago. Hell, would've made me nervous yesterday. But not right now. Not when I knew I held the power to end his life, or semblance of it. Knowing so made me smile.

And my sudden sense of comfort certainly got his attention. "Aw, did I make you nervous, Klaus?" I said to him when I finally saw his eyes widen. "Well, don't you worry. You'll come out of this alive."

Prying his mouth open was no small feat. It took more elbow grease than I had expected and I almost cut myself on his fangs. I wondered how he could actively resist my intrusion with so much force with his freaking heart stopped. I wondered if there was a spell in one of the grimoires to help out with that. I laughed at the thought. Klaus' eyes told me I had made him nervous again. Poor baby.

I unstopped the vial and began the spell.

"_Phasmatos __intacurum __callas__. __Ligabos __animo s__sanguis __sacrificixium__. __Imitari __manes __corpus__. __Quod __sequituro __ratinexis __vivit__."_

The flames from the candles shot up a foot while I poured the mixture of Tyler and mine's blood into Klaus' mouth, filling the dimly lit locker with an orange glow and eerie shadows. Klaus shut his mouth and I watched him swallow. His chapped and shriveled lips pulled back into something of a smile.

Until I dragged the tip of the swiss army knife across his neck. Klaus' healing ability made it hard to collect enough blood on the blade, but luckily I didn't need much. The second I touched the blade to my tongue the candles blew out and I felt my blood thickening in my veins. This was what Abby warned me about. The amount of power coursing through my body somehow felt muddy; it felt tainted. I felt like I was going to be sick. But the show had to go on.

I latched onto the coffin for support and finished the spell. "_Phasmatos __Tribum__, __Melan __Veras __Raddiam__, __Onu __Pavadus __Ponemus_. _Adiungimuxae __vitae__. __Coniungere __esse __centrum__. __Somno __Ritum __Per __Dax __Ritum__."_

Suddenly the candles were lit again and I was throwing up on the side of the coffin. I wiped my mouth with my sleeve and faced Klaus again. I probably only had another minute before Damon came barging in.

"Klaus, let me be absolutely clear. The second you get out of hand, I pull the plug and you will vacate Tyler's body. Should Alaric kill you, you will go to Elijah, have him retrieve your body and he'll bring it to me. I'll do what I can to get you back into your body and you will get lost. Gone. No more Mystic Falls for you and your family. So much as contemplate taking Elena with you, you go poof. If you so much as entertain the notion of doing any harm to me, I sever what keeps you in Tyler's body and you become nothing. You will be less than a ghost. You will be a memory no one cares for and your essence will roam shapelessly until after the fucking apocalypse. I have your life in my hands, Klaus. If I've learned anything about you, it's that your need for attention and friends is second only to your self-preservation. Do. Not. Try. Me, Klaus. If you understand me, blink twice."

A slow smirk crept onto his face, he blinked twice and a second later Damon was pounding on the door.


	10. Chapter 10

It should have been Klaus. Klaus should be dead. I shouldn't have had to save him. He's scourged the world for a thousand years and still gets to breathe. But not Elena. It isn't fair. My skin was crawling from the disgust I felt. I played a hand in keeping him alive. But I didn't have a choice; It was either save Klaus or two of my dear friends would have died. And despite the measures I had gone through to save Caroline and Tyler, I still lost two.

"FUCK!"

I threw my phone onto the passenger seat as I switched lanes to catch my exit on the highway. I'd been going over 90 mph for the last hour since Jeremy called. And no one was picking up their phones. Not Matt, not Damon, not Stefan, not Caroline. I had even tried Elena a few times in hopes that... in hopes that what? That Jeremy had maybe hallucinated the entire exchange with Alaric's ghost? I had been kidding myself. I knew he hadn't hallucinated, but I had dialed her number anyway.

My best friend was dead. Jeremy's big sister. Dead.

And Matt. He had been with her; whisked her away to get her out of danger. Was he dead too?

I'd been fighting back the tears since Jeremy called. Crying and speeding didn't mix well but I was fighting a losing battle. The street lights were becoming globs of yellow; headlights white and blue. I was only ten minutes away from Jeremy but I couldn't keep it together. Elena was dead. She was dead. Matty was probably dead too. The thoughts kept playing in my head. And then the memories. Playing "light as a feather, stiff as a board" at a sleepover with Elena when we were 9. I chuckled, if only we had known I was a witch then, we could've really made Caroline float. The two of us beating up Matt for throwing spitballs at us in the 5th grade. I decelerated to a painfully slow crawl to wipe the tears from my eyes. Elena and Matt.

And what made me want to cry harder was the fact that I was still mad at her. In fact, I was more mad at her now than I had been before. Elena's a teenager, or she was. Elena was supposed to do stupid things. She was supposed to fall in love and be a little reckless. I knew that, but her right to be a reckless teenager and her own version of loyalty had cost us all so much. She always chose the Salvatores. Chose the Salvatores over the rest of us. Her involvement with the brothers had cost her Jenna, Alaric, John, Isobel and had it not been for the Gilbert ring, it would have cost her Jeremy too. It had cost Matt his sister, Tyler his father and uncle, had taken Caroline's human life, it had cost me Grams and my mother. And regardless of everything, she and the Salvatores pressed on. I tried to shoo the thought away but we should have all been surprised she hadn't died sooner. In the end, her involvement with Stefan and Damon had cost her her life.

When I finally pulled the Prius into the Gilbert driveway, I had to give myself a minute. I was sobbing. The memories of the gaps Elena had filled in my lonely childhood and the simultaneous resentment I felt were ripping me apart. I wish I was more forgiving, more understanding. I felt like a horrible friend and person for even thinking those things, but no amount of reminiscing could stave off the anger. And the fact that she died while we were trying to save her and and to some extent, the Salvatores was too much to bear. Everything was so screwed up.

I'd been sitting in my car a good while before I could gain some composure. I took a deep breath, a few actually, to stop crying. I was heartbroken and furious, but I knew Jeremy would be worse off. The grief he must be feeling right now would be paralysing. I pulled myself together for him; Jeremy needed a clutch right now. I yanked my glove compartment open, took out a wad of tissues and got to work cleaning up the streaks of mascara running down my face.

And despite myself, my eyes were overflowing with tears again by the time I got to the front door. I walked in and stopped short.

Jeremy had been through hell in the last two years. He'd lost his parents, his aunt, his uncle, a few girlfriends, Alaric, but I'd never seen his face look like that. His expression was one of a person who was wading so deeply in hurt that he could barely breathe. Jeremy was drowning. It undid me.

I found him sitting on the bottom of the stairs, elbows on his knees, a wooden stake in his hand and tears flowing freely. I ran to him. He dropped the stake, wrapped his arms around my hips and cried into my stomach. My tears were clouding my vision again and we shook together, both sobbing. I ran my fingers through his hair and rubbed his back for what felt like hours. We'd never been so silent together. And I almost wished we would have stayed quiet when he finally looked up with a tear-stained face and bloodshot eyes and told me, "I thought I was saving her."

"No, no, no, no. Jeremy, whatever happened had nothing to do with you. Nothing. You did the best thing anyone's done for her since Stefan and Damon came back to Mystic Falls. You tried to get her out." My words were frantic and I busied myself wiping the tears from his face to no avail. They kept falling.

"I tried to be the hero, Bonnie. I tried to save her. I'm not a fucking vampire and I don't have powers to bring people back from the dead. I'm a stupid fucking kid and I should've just kept her here! And Matt. He's probably dead too because I wanted to be the fucking hero. I can't keep anyone safe."

"Jeremy, listen to me," I put my hands on the side of his face and lifted it, making him take his eyes off the floor. "You are a good brother and a great friend. And you didn't do anything wrong." I took his hand in mine and sat on the step next to him. "Look, we'll keep calling everyone until we find out what's happened. I'll stay with you. We'll get some answers. And if I can, I'll bring her back."

He chuckled, wiped his face with the sleeve of his hoodie and turned to face me. "Oh, because that's worked out great in the past, Bonnie."

"I'm staring at you right now, aren't I? We didn't have to bury you after you got shot, did we? I stopped your heart yesterday, Jeremy. I can bring Elena back. If she's gone, I can bring her back."

"At what fucking price though? She's my sister and I love her but I can't handle," his voice cracked. "I can't handle losing the both of you. You can't keep playing God and think that there won't be consequences, Bonnie. You've already gotten your powers taken away."

"Jeremy, if I lose my powers again, I'll deal with it. She's my friend. She's your sister. And don't act like you can handle losing her. You can't. I can't."

"The spirits or ancestors or whatever are not gonna let you bring someone else back. You spent your one get-out-of-jail-free card on me."

"I _just_ killed you and brought you back. Without the spirits. They don't own me. And neither do you. It's not your decision to make. I'm going to try."

"Matt was with her. What if he's dead too? You gonna bring them both back? I don't own you, Bonnie, but I know you can't use that type of power. And you can't choose to bring one back and not the other."

"Why are we even arguing about this? Elena is your sister, Jeremy! Your sister! And Matt's been a friend to us since we were both kids! If I can bring them both back, I will. I'll handle it. I'll fix it."

Jeremy stood up and faced me. "You'll fucking die if you try."

"We'll cross that bridge when we get to it."

"Bonnie, what the hell is wrong with you? You're not going to kill yourself! I guess you having a death-wish hasn't changed since we were together."

"Fuck you, Jeremy. And apparently, you haven't tried to understand me since we were together, either. I don't know how many times I have to tell you. I'm the only one of us that can fix things! I have powers for a reason. The fucking Salvatores have ruined everything since they came back to fight over Elena, Elena being a doppelganger has done nothing but bring Klaus to Mystic Falls, Caroline and Tyler are only useful when we need them to fight and the only good your little bit does is bring back the ghosts of your ex-girlfriends! Who you fucking make-out with! I wasn't meant to light candles for the rest of my life!"

"The rest of your life won't be very long if you keep pushing yourself. And I don't know what about having powers and a grimoire puts 'God complex and no sense of self-preservation' in the job description."

That was unnecessary. Everything I did as far as my magic went was for my friends. I gave everything I had to them. I had sacrificed too much for him to be this cold to me. I stood up and walked toward the door. I came to comfort him but I couldn't deal with Jeremy lashing out at me. It hurt too much. I was going to start drowning too. I paused when I put my hand on the knob, expecting him to say something. He didn't say a word. I swung the door open and walked out.

* * *

I was so angry. At myself, at Bonnie, at Elena, at everyone and everything. But as I watched Bonnie walk out my door, I felt the last little piece of the sanity I was holding on to start to break.

"Bonnie! Bonnie, wait." I sprinted after her and caught up when she was a few feet from her car. "Bonnie, come back inside, please. I need you."

She still had her back to me. "So does everyone else, Jer. But you beat me up for doing what I can."

I walked between her and her car to get a good look at her face. She'd been inside crying with me for at least an hour and somehow she seemed prettier. Her lips were fuller, eyes wider. Leave it to Bonnie to be a vision when most people looked their worst. "It's not that. You know I appreciate everything you've done for everyone, for me. But I just sent my sister to her death and I've barely had time to let that sink in. I'm not gonna stand by and watch you kill yourself to bring her back. The guilt.. it would..." I couldn't finish the sentence because I didn't know what it'd do to me, but I knew it wouldn't be good. I'm not the same kid who tried to turn himself into a vampire, but I knew that I was at risk of going off the deep end. I had thought that the anger I felt at Bonnie's hardheadedness had kept the tears at bay but the thought of losing her too? My chest constricted and my eyes filled with tears again. "Just please, Bonnie, I can't deal with putting you at risk."

She seemed to be considering what I said. She stayed quiet, just looking up at me with her big eyes. They were darker tonight, more hazel than green. I knew I was younger than her, that I didn't have powers, but I just wanted to wrap my arms around her little body and keep her from harm. She's all I had left.

"I'm not making any promises. I'm going to look at Abby's grimoire and if I find something and it can be done, I'm bringing her back."

A new wave of frustration came on, but I didn't want to stand in my driveway going back and forth for the rest of the night. We had calls to make. "Fine, Bonnie. We'll figure it out, but let's go inside. And I'm sorry I let you walk out." I grabbed her hand and lead her back into the house. She didn' object, luckily.

When we walked in, I saw the stake I had taken from Alaric's stash on the floor, picked it up and tucked it into the waistband of my jeans.

"Who was that for?" Bonnie asked with a raised eyebrow.

"Anyone with fangs." I'd figured after seeing Alaric's ghost that if Elena had died, it had to do with vampires. All the trouble we've had since Mom and Dad died have been because of them. The assumption wasn't so far fetched.

I was done dealing with them. All of them, Salvatores included. Salvatores especially. If they couldn't keep Elena alive, they served no purpose.

"Let's not get ahead of ourselves. We don't know how it happened."

"Doesn't matter, Bonnie. I'm not playing nice anymore. My family spent generations trying to kill them for a reason. And I don't need to remind you what they've been doing to your family for centuries."

"No you don't. I just don't want you getting hurt either. You're flipping out about me doing magic and I don't want to start worrying about you picking fights with vampires. At least not without me around."

Ever the protector. I pulled her into my arms and kissed her forehead. I can't believe I let myself be away from her for as long as I did. This girl with a heart of gold who'd do anything, however foolish, to protect the people she had left. I understood her more than she knew. I just didn't like her well-being always being on the chopping block.

She slipped her hand under my shirt to rub my back and the contact made me stir. The stake was in the way, so vigilantism be damned, I threw it back on the floor. I brought her lips up to mine and inhaled her. Our tongues clashed, mouths salty from the time spent crying. I needed this, I needed her so badly. I kissed her with a desperation I didn't know I had in me. I pulled her sweater from her body to feel closer to her, put my hands under her shirt and on her warm skin. Her heavy breathing and wet mouth made me hard as a rock. Her arms were around my shoulders and when she raised her leg, I lifted her to straddle me. I walked over to the couch, lips never separating and sat down with her on top of me. Her left hand on the side of my face, her right on the nape of my neck and she started to grind. The movement of her hips was magical. And she was so warm. I was already forgetting everything around me, all the problems that lay just outside the span of our bodies. She encased me with everything I was missing. She filled a void in me. With Bonnie, I wasn't alone in the world. I took my hoodie and shirt off, and took her shirt off as well. My hands were palming her ass, supple and thick, that was moving back and forth on my lap. I wanted her. I wanted to finish what we'd started in her room last night.

But I should've known better. I had Bonnie's bottom lip in my mouth, my left hand on her ass and my right about to unhook her bra strap when my phone rang in the pocket of my jeans. The real world penetrated our little bubble and we remembered Elena. She jumped off me and I reached into my pocket to get my phone.

"Stefan," I announced when I saw his name on the screen. "What the fuck happened to my sister, Stefan?"


End file.
